This time last year my life looked very different which is something that has been on my mind a lot lately, I’m recognising the changes and constant adjustments that I’ve made in my life in such a short span of time, I have more interests and hobbies than I did a year ago and I do more with myself, but 2020, as I’ve said so many times, has been hard. It didn’t really take me long to recognise I was getting into unhealthy habits thanks to my hardships and that I was starting to wallow a bit, so I decided that three months into 2020, I’m going to change things completely.
This is always easier said than done and I do feel like when I write blogs posts of this nature I get a little bit overly ambitious and definitely overestimate how much one person can do so I’m not making a bucket list or anything like that, but I’m talking through the changes that I’ve already started to make, how they’ve affected me and why my mental health has improved gradually thanks to my changes.
Mental health is something that we definitely need to value and cherish and nurture within ourselves, we can’t help feeling low and sad from time to time and when things happen that we can’t control that aren’t good it’s only natural that we get sad, but it’s what we do after the sadness that counts.
So, one weekend morning, as I lay in bed struggling to motivate myself to get up and do something, I decided that I was going to make a plan and list out what I wanted to achieve in the next 6 months, I felt like 6 months was a kind time limit to set myself and enough time to make slow and steady steps instead of rushing to the finish line had I given myself 6 weeks.
I thought about my interests present and past, things that I want to do and would like to continue doing, things that I’d like to resume doing and things that I need to do. I thought about what makes me happy, who makes me happy and why. It wasn’t anything too deep but once I realised where my happiness lay it was easy to map out the next 6 months of self nurturing.
So here it is…
By September I will:
- Have an office
The same week that I decided that I was going to be doing this I also decided to give myself an office, I have a spare bedroom that I’ve been using as a dressing room since I moved in and realised it was a bit of a pointless room right now, so I began redecorating and I’m not quite finished yet, there’s still lots to be done, but one of the joys in my life is my work. I love to write and I’m fiercly passionate about photography, but my current work space is my coffee table and the floor in my living room, since I find it hard to work on the sofa.
This often affects my concentration and I find myself procrastinating and getting distracted easier, so having an office is to ensure that I get on with my work and get ish done.
- Have Tried Streaming
This only came about a couple days before I began writing this but now that I’ve had time to think on it I’m super into the idea. I won’t say that I’ll be streaming because I don’t know how it’ll go or how comfortable I’ll actually be, but I’ll have at least tried it.
The idea came to me when a follower suggested that since I had admitted to loving creatives show their process in real time, I should give it a go too. I asked my Instagram follower if they’d be keen on seeing me edit photos or something on a stream which got a really positive response, so I’m going to give it a go and see how I get on with it.
- Be back in the flow of content creation
This is a big one for me. Because my mental health took such a blow, so did my content. I stopped creating completely at the start of the year and felt deflated, uninspired and bored.
A big part of the reason for this is because I’ve been held back, I kind of stopped doing things just because I wanted to and got back into the bad habit of relying on someone elses opinion too much, when said person was always a negative nancy it started to affect my inspiration, I rarely found inspiration and my work flow slowed down because I just wasn’t inspired, everything I liked was too mediocre.
I’ve had time to rely on just my opinion and I’m once again: completely inspired. I have a lot of ideas going through my mind at the minute and I feel like I know how I want to execute them so I’m excited to get those things off the ground, I also feel like my overall interests and things that I’ve always loved have started to come back to me, I’ve become interested in anime again lately which is honestly where a lot of my inspiration back in the day came from, I’m also really into sci-fi themes at the minute and have been working my way through search engines to get some information, references, inspiration and guidance with what I’m aiming to achieve this year.
It’s nice to be back in the swing of things and feel inspired, obviously right now I need to make the first step to get my ideas off the ground or to at least get back into consistent posting.
- Be healthy
Mentally and physically, the biggest achievement of this year for me that I’m striving for is health. I said in a previous post that I wanted to learn how to cook better meals and I wanted to get myself into the habit of eating better which is something that’s definitely important to me right now, I’m not looking to lose weight or anything but I just want to feel better within myself and have a bit more energy. My mental health is also extremely valuable to me right now too because I’ve realised, looking back on things, I’ve been down for a while and I’d lost my motivation and interests, I was stressed and upset constantly. I feel like a weight has been lifted recently and I’m feeling good, but I want to make the effort to feel good.
I’ve been looking into ways to keep my head cool, my feelings in check and my priorities straight. I’ve been making an effort to keep my relationship with God on a strong path and have even looked into furthering my spirituality – something that right now since I don’t feel strongly educated enough, I’ll leave at that.
- BE HAPPY!!!!!!!
This is the absolute BIGGEST goal, and I know it ties in with my last point a bit but I just feel like I want to be and deserve to be happy, I’ve been through a lot and it just feels like I need to take time to myself to become truly happy and sound.
I’ve also decided with this that I’ll be completely transparent, I’ll be honest when I’m feeling a bit crap and I’ll be honest when I’m over the moon. I’m kinda bored of pretending everything’s OK when it’s not, yknow?
Hopefully in September these simple, achievable goals will have been met – and if not, I’ll update you on how I intend to improve on that.