When you’re in a serious relationship and eventually make the leap into moving in together, things change. The fact you’re living together is already a massive change and is hopefully a good thing that you’re excited about, but as the weeks pass by you begin to notice things have changed. You’re in a routine and you’re cuddled up on the sofa more often than before, you’re giving each other good morning kisses and arguing over who took up the most space in the bed last night.
So when you’re coming from a long distance relationship into moving in together, there’s no warming up period because time together was so limited, essentially you’re going from one extreme to another and it’s a major learning curve between the two of you.
Which is exactly what happened between Pedro and I. We went from only seeing each other every four months or so to seeing each other every day, sharing a home and distributing chores and tasks, finding things to eat for tea and heading out more often on the weekends, we even hosted our first party three weeks after moving in.
When I think about how far we’ve come, from exclusively Skype calling and only spending a week or two together at a time, it excites me. Life is a funny thing that can change so quickly and this was the best sort of change, it was one we both spoke about for a year and a half and we finally got to the point. We were celebratory and excited.
But now we’ve warmed up into regular kisses and cuddles, arguing when playing Tekken because frankly, I’m crap and can’t get a hit in, eating the same dinner each night and adjusting to each others routine – Pedro who was once a night owl is now tired by 10 as I’m secretly an elderly lady that likes to be in bed by 8.
Being Portuguese also means that Pedro has never made a cup of tea the way us brits have them, or at least he hadn’t until my parents asked him to make one whilst they sat on our sofa and even I expressed, “Can you make me a cuppa please?” before bed one evening because my cold was destroying my ability to rest.
As we get to know each other in new ways though and as we’ve come to adjust to the new way of living, I definitely feel like we’ve become closer. As couples do and even as we did before, we bicker and negotiate which isn’t anything mind-blowing or new but it’s about new things, it’s over silly things like as I previously mentioned, being beat at Tekken and it’s over one of us taking too long to get ready (normally me), it’s over the fact that I forgot something at the flat and have to run down the street to grab it again, and it’s over not knowing what to have for tea tonight. But it makes me feel so much closer to him and I can’t help but appreciate it.
I definitely feel like since we have moved in together and the long-distance aspect of our relationship is now a thing of the past I have a clearer mind, there’s a weight that’s been lifted off my shoulders too. The long-distance aspect felt hard to carry over the last few months, and right now we may be in some sort of honeymoon phase, who really knows, but we’ve both been feeling more content within ourselves and what was once quite sad is now just purely happy. Our circumstances don’t have people feeling sorry for us (which, can’t lie, used to annoy me slightly), and we speak about the future with more certainty because we haven’t got it in the back of our minds that maybe a move won’t be possible or there will be too many hold-ups which might mean it’s too late *ahem Brexit* so the relationship overall is more relaxed and I feel like we’re both just simply enjoying each others company now.