We all like to consider ourselves open minded individuals – I won’t lie, I think I’m very open minded, it’s known as a positive trait and others find it appealing – nobody will admit that they’re narrow minded and nobody wants to be. It’s seen as something negative and has a bad light shed on it – who wants to be something known as bad?
To be open minded can be a branch of many things, you’ll be quick to assume that this means politically and socially, but it can also mean that when presented with an option or with a truth, you’re willing to accept that there’s a bigger picture – there’s not something definitive about anything. Which leads me to what the actual topic of this article is about: personalities.
When I look back at certain times in my life, I never truly believe that I am the same person now as I was then – do you? Ten years ago I would’ve been eleven, I was exploring the alternative scene and calling myself emo – because we, as humans, have a tendency to love labels, this is probably because sticking a name onto something means that it’s easy to recognise diversity and unique traits in each individual, but as time goes on we change. I definitely would never call myself emo in this day and age, I don’t know what I’d call myself, because throughout different periods of my life, I have adapted to new tastes, styles and ways of being.
At some point I was stuck on listening to rap music and R&B at all times, at one point I only wanted to listen to 90s grunge bands and at another point I was hell bent on dressing like a 6’0 tall male skater. Which is why now: I’m a mix of everything and everyone I’ve ever been. I don’t believe that there is such a thing as a set personality, I believe that in the next ten years I’ll look back on phases I had and continue to say the same thing – that I evolved and became a mix of the woman I grew into throughout my twenties, then in twenty years, it’ll be the same thing again: I had phases and acquired new tastes which made me become a mix of the child, teenager and woman I’ve ever been in my forties. There’s no such thing as a set, definitive personality.
Life is a funny thing too, because different events will change our opinions and what we see the world as, I feel like I’ve fluctuated a lot throughout my lifetime with my opinions on anything social and political, I don’t want to dive too much into my political stand points but I’ve definitely had a swift change of views ever since the happenings of Brexit, a party I once thought was going to stand for me is one that lately I haven’t been too sure about, but if I told myself that even five years ago, I’d have laughed in my own face.
But life is ever changing, what we once know to be true will change, and as a result, who we are as people changes too. Don’t get me wrong, the foundations are always there, the things I once loved, although I don’t feel so strongly about them now, I do still like and admire them, and the things that I once hated, many of those things, I have less strong feelings for but definitely wouldn’t put them into my green area – I also feel like we must change and our personalities must grow with us. There’s the sciencey bits such as hormones and whatnot, this probably contributes as well, if we were all stuck as moody teenagers the world would definitely be more chaotic, but I also feel like we are constantly being prepared for new obstacles, things that we must learn and grow from. Whether it’s tough times, events or people that we meet that are our learning curve.
There’s no such thing as black and white in my opinion – nothing is ever either way. But I also think that it’s important to accept the ambiguity of life and the people around us. I find it harsh when people say things like, “You’ve changed.” in a negative light, whether it’s on TV or in real life, because change is one of the most important things that we go through in life, it’s a necessity and I think that the more we embrace change and encourage it, the better that life will feel.