This time of year is always very difficult for me. I find myself getting into a bit of a slump – this is my own doing since I have it drilled into my head that Spring/Summer should be magical, filled with things to do every weekend and the weather should be amazing. Obviously I live in Great Britain, it’s always less than 20 degrees unless we have a “heat wave” and the city I live in isn’t exactly brimming with things to do, which can be quite hard to accept.
I’m the type of person who is never happy unless I have something on my mind to focus on, if I end up in a situation where I have nothing going on in my life to really put my energy into, then I get very bored and miserable. Right now I actually do have something to focus on (more on that, much later), but this time of year makes me want more and more on my plate. I don’t know what it is, but I find myself getting a little bit worked up over my lack of busy schedule.
I try to tell myself to relax and slow down, but it’s just something about myself that doesn’t seem to change year in and year out, especially ever since I started blogging.
This always usually ends up with me taking a mini-blog-break, every year, because I need a time out to loosen up a little bit. I over work my brain into trying to come up with ideas and things to talk about, and then I fall short and can’t seem to get my fingers to type out anything interesting or worthy.
I’ve always tried to maintain a schedule on my blog, I try to post every 3 days and sometimes it gets a little bit annoying. Not because it’s difficult, but because my brain just won’t seem to let me type out what I’m trying to say. So, taking a time out and reflecting is normally always the option that I gun for.
This time, I began reflecting on how open and honest I am, I try to write posts where my opinion on blogging, life and fads in general is coming across, and I’ve also started The Under 5’5 Club, where I’m trying to be helpful to all of the short arses who read my blog, but it never seems enough.
I don’t think that Twitter and Instagram really help my mentality either, I see bloggers doing things, going out and about, exploring their magnificent cities and I do get a bit of life envy. I wish that my city wasn’t so boring to look at, I wish that I had a cool photographer friend who would go out with me and spend a day taking loads of pics, but alas, I still self shoot for the most part and my city isn’t changing any time soon.
So why not make the most of what I have? Well, you see, I tend to forget that the Instagram/Twitter lense is usually very foggy. People are selecting what they want us to see, so of course I’ll get life envy. I’m sure if I’m witty enough with what I post, how I post it and when, I can give the same effect. Because social media is an illusion.
So here’s where relaxing comes into it. I need to take a chill pill, stop stressing over my very average, yet very happy life not matching up to so and so’s Instagram page.
So over the past few weeks I’ve just been taking it slow, relaxing with my time and trying to conjure up a post in which I can express these feelings without repeating myself.
As I was saying earlier on, I took the time to have a good look at my blog, see what my most successful posts were vs my least successful, how perhaps in future I can improve the least successful ones so that more people are interested in what I have to say, and how I can take inspiration from the posts that did well in my future writing. I noticed that the posts where I’ve relaxed, where I’ve opened up a little bit and lost the self consciousness seemed to be doing the best, I think people appreciate when a blogger pokes their head out of the curtain and says: IT’S NOT ALL AS IT SEEMS!
I also wrote a tweet out saying that I’m really glad I keep my personal life, for the most part, off social media, after going on my old Facebook page and cringing at how much I over-shared. I feel like this is also a benefactor in my social media presence as well as how I feel daily. I can’t see myself ever daily vlogging or posting intricate details of my life because a fourteen year old me, who felt the need to share everything, was a lot more miserable than the twenty year old me who keeps herself to herself. It relaxes me. I don’t feel constant pressure to post.
This also leaks into how I blog, the constant pressure to post just isn’t there these days. I feel like I can miss or skip a day and people will still come back, yes, there’s so many other bloggers out there posting daily or keeping a strict schedule, but if you really like my blog, you’ll keep coming back, and I really appreciate it.
So, here’s to not stressing myself out just because of the season. Here’s to taking blogging, a little bit more seriously, whilst relaxing and not stressing out.