Ever since I started to become myself, you know, the pre-teen years where you start to discover who you may or may not turn out to be for the rest of your life, music played a massive part in how I dressed and felt. I’m not ashamed to admit my music taste hasn’t really changed and that it still affects my look.
When I was eleven or twelve, I discovered two things that I would find that I still love well into my adult life. These were anime and rock music. Obviously I’ve spoken about anime before so I’m not going into loads of detail about that but what I haven’t really spoken about is how music affected the way I looked growing up and still does now.
Don’t get me wrong, I still look back and cringe at myself because I have made some massive fashion no-no’s over the years and they are well embarrassing. I might look back at how I dress today and feel embarrassed, but back then, in my mind I was a bad ass going through your typical teenage emo phase. Yikes.
In all honesty, it was bands like My Chemical Romance, Thirty Seconds To Mars and Bring Me The Horizon that pushed me into what style I had. I’m using the word style very loosely here though, because I had none and I wore fingerless gloves and I hate myself for it. If I could show you a photograph of myself between the ages of eleven and fourteen without wanting to go and bury my head in some deep sand, I would, but I just can’t bring myself to. I was the embodiment of cringe.
But anyway, self loathing aside, I really did let the whole “emo” sub culture dictate my look. If I knew what Pinterest was back then, I bet you I’d have made a board for all things emo, Jared Leto and there would definitely be a board in there for Twilight. Oh gosh, I’m recoiling in my seat just writing this. I thought I was cool, but you know what, maybe I was, because I didn’t give a damn about what other people thought about me and I was happy to just be myself, and that in itself is cool, even if an adult me thinks that I was cringe.
Even though I haven’t got any time for Thirty Seconds To Mars’ new music, their bangers like Capricorn are still songs that I go back to and they make me want to fish out that Echelon guitar pick guitar necklace that I used to wear (not really, I’m glad I threw it out), and put on those ugly Rowfers fingerless gloves.
Music now definitely shapes my dress sense though, I still buy band merch, my Basement hoodie is still one of my favourite things in my wardrobe, and even though I do like “mainstream” music a lot, I think that my look and my taste in music go hand in hand. I think Hayley Williams and Lynn Gunn have the most bad ass styles and those two are women in rock, I actually look up to them both for their sense of style. Lynn will wear all black and not give a damn about what anyone says and Hayley will dye her hair unconventional colours and look like a total babe doing so.
So, if these are the women I’m looking up to, and the music I listen to is mostly alt-rock, how am I not going to get influenced by it? I can’t imagine myself not dressing to fit my music taste either, as a kid I was a huge fan of Eminem and used to dress in tracksuits a lot (also cringe), so it only makes sense that as my music taste shifted, my sense in clothes matched up to it.
I understand how as a teenager, your music taste defines you completely, and I’ve learned that you grow out of that, but your taste in music will still always play a massive part in your style.
If I could go back in time and talk to my younger self, I’d tell myself to experiment with my look and that it’s okay sometimes to go out of my “roots” and try something new, but I know that no matter what, I’ll always come back to my more alternative/rock taste in music, and it’ll always be the route my sense of style goes down.
I feel like no matter who I like to listen to, I’m always going to have them influence me a little bit. There’s nothing wrong with that and I like dressing to fit my music taste because I do think my taste in music is a massive part of who I am.