For a long time I kept the fact I was seriously seeing someone on the down low, I didn’t want to parade him around or make him feel uncomfortable being plastered across my social media. I wanted to though, because when you love someone you want the whole world to know about them, see how great they are and why you love them. But our relationship also hasn’t been an easy one, with it beginning as a long distance relationship. Naturally, those aren’t easy. But it’s taught me a lot, and it’s really made me grow as an individual person.
A long distance relationship isn’t for everyone, they require so much patience and work, and you need to be strong for each other on a daily basis. It can get sad when you’re missing them, and it can be amazing when you finally get to spend some time together, it makes it feel so worth it.
It’s taught me patience
I’m the least patient person you’ll ever meet, my favourite saying is “make haste,” when someone has me waiting on them and I’m very quick to get things done just because I don’t like waiting so why should someone else?
But the thing is, with a long distance relationship you have absolutely no choice other than to be patient. You have to be okay waiting a few months here and there until you get to see each other, you have to be okay with waiting for a Skype call if they’re busy (more often than not though I’m fussy about that one haha!) and you have to be willing to put the work in.
All relationships require work, but when it’s long distance you can’t express your feelings through physical contact, you can’t just go and give them a quick peck or ask for a cuddle, and you can’t be with them for as long as you’d like. So you have to be patient, persevere and work hard to keep things fresh, happy and fun.
It’s taught me to appreciate
Every second I get to spend with my partner, I appreciate it. Every second we spend on call, every second we spend messaging, I can’t tell you how much it means to me. We take for granted being able to spend time with our loved ones, so being apart for the most of the year makes it a little bit difficult to not appreciate the moments you do get to share. I love spending time with him, seeing his country and getting the opportunity to have time with him.
It’s taught me about his culture!
Probably not as much as you’d think, but he tells me things from time to time, and the first time I ever went to Lisbon he was full of fun facts and told me a lot about his countries history and stories he liked. I’ve also had to become open to letting random people (who he knows obvz) come kiss me on the cheeks when they meet me. Something we definitely don’t do in the UK. Funnily enough he was well shocked that we don’t do it when I told him.
It’s taught me how to budget
Our relationship has been expensive in terms of paying for flights and saving for spends, so when I decide to go and see him, I spend a lot of time budgeting and working out how much I need to save by x date and how I can save for it without missing out on treats and events.
I’ve never had responsibilities before, and I’ve never had something that I spend loads on, I’d say that a long distance relationship, when you’re able to jet off to see them, is pretty expensive. If you’re in the same country it’s not quite the same as hopping on a train or driving down the motorway to go and be with them, so with us being in separate countries, I have to save a lot of money up when I decide to go and visit. I obviously don’t mind it, I love Portugal and every time I’ve been he’s shown me something new, which is also key. It’d suck if I went to see him and hated his country.