TO BE UNASHAMED TO FEEL IN LOVE

Just lately I’ve been thinking a lot about relationships and specifically, PDA. I’m a rom-com girl and earlier this week my boyfriend and I watched the movie Overboard – the remake, not the original. The concept is pretty ludicrous, it’s basically about a rich Mexican man and a poor American falling in love through him falling off his expensive yacht and getting amnesia, and her teaching him a lesson in what it’s like to be poor after he scoffs at her when she’s working for him. It was pretty good to be honest, but ever since we watched it the thought of: How in love can you be? has been on my mind. 

In movies, the characters can be in love and as publicly affectionate as they very well please, nobody cringes or tells them they’re being “too much,” and you sit through the romance with a big smile on your face because we love love. When it comes to the real world though, writing love letters, hand holding and giving your partner a quick peck on the lips isn’t seen as something that is cool or acceptable anymore. The manic-pixie-girl is what most teenagers aim to be and as an adult you’re trying to be hard to get so that nobody finds you “easy”? What?

When I scroll through my social media and I see couples being lovey-dovey, sharing posts with photographs of each other professing their love to the world, that is what I like to see. I like to see couples who are proud to be in love, happy about the fact and aren’t ashamed to share it with everyone. Obviously there’s a line between being really cute and being really overbearing with “my snwuggle bwear” captions (seen it), and a full on tongue in mouth make out sesh in a restaurant (seen it), but I’ve also seen couples who sit in utter silence on their phones not even looking at each other eating their meals. How is that any fun?

Well, I’m not ashamed to be in love and I’m definitely not ashamed to show it to everyone. Comments stick with me, and over the years comments about annoying couples have stuck with me, making me feel a little bit embarrassed to be cutesy and showing everyone my love for my S/O. I’m in love, and why shouldn’t I hold my partners hand, give him a quick peck or tell him that I love him in a room full of people? What’s so wrong about being in love that we have to mute ourselves until we’re alone?

I’m a sucker for love. I’ve mentioned having not-so-great relationships when I spoke about signs to look for when things aren’t going so great, but I’ve always wanted to be in love. I’ve not been too eager to hop into any old relationship, but I definitely was eager to see who my love would be and let me tell ya, I wasn’t disappointed. On-screen couples like Nick and Jess, Sally and Harry are what I always aspired to achieve, and whilst we’re definitely very different to both couples, I feel like both couples taught me that it’s okay to love someone and let people know about it.

I definitely don’t think I’ve always been an affectionate person though. I think for me it took finding the right person to want to be affectionate with to unlock this part of my personality, and now I just simply can’t get enough. I love little signals and thoughtful acts of affection. When I got sent a bouquet of roses and lillies I made sure to keep the little note that came with it and put it in my scrap book to keep, and whenever we’ve done outings together and I’ve had a good time, I’ve kept the leaflets and tickets to scrapbook too, because I want to look back on our happy times.

To me, there’s nothing better than seeing a big smile on your partners face after you say or do something that makes them happy, and there’s nothing more rewarding or satisfying than seeing how it affects their mood for the rest of the day, or when they mention it later on in the future and talk about how they felt happy in that moment
I definitely think that people are afraid of things not going well and then looking back at all the times they were cutesy and affectionate publicly, and cringing because other people remember how in love they looked. But there’s nothing wrong with that if it is the outcome, and that’s also the worst possible thought to have if you’re looking to be with this person for the rest of your life. When will you ever show and display your love and affection if you’re so afraid of what other people are thinking and saying? Who cares? I don’t. If I want to be loudly in love, if I want to be a bit cringe, because that’s what people seem to be quite happy to call affectionate couples, then oh well. I’m happy in the moment, that’s what matters the most. Not other peoples bitter opinions.
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